Life Mate

The mehendi woman had almost finished both my palms and started off with my feet. It was my wedding in 2 days. But I wasnt as excited as a bride to be should be. I felt at times that someone opened me n ripped a piece of my soul . I was in touch with him but hadnt seen him for months now.Arnav has been my friend since so many years.And probably loved him only him.. Or whatever those emotions were.

We used to be happy with each other just by looking into each others eyes and sharing every detail of each others heart. Even when he dated Vishakha and told me all the details. He and Vishakha dated for 5 years and were in a steady relationship. I had my own bad luck with relationships. I probably might have searched for my Arnav in every man I dated.

Arnav broke up with Vishakha and refused to believe in love again. Vishakha had dumped him as she had no guts to go against her parents. My Arnav was very much broken hearted.He really had loved her and lost her. I could not see him this way.Years went by and he could nt forget Vishakha. And I could not give up on him too. But I knew it ' to love someone is to set them free' Although he knew I loved him his interpretation was that it was just because I was too close and shared everything that i felt so , but there was never anything.He always said we are more than friends but we arenot lovers. It was bloody complicated although my facebook status said single

Arnav flew off to US when he got an offer from Goldman Sachs. He was in their legal department.Goldman was both our dream company and working on wall street was like nirvana for us

We both got busy in our day to day life. I became a economist with Credit Suisse and started writing reports about global economy. I loved my job a little too much A little less than I loved Arnav ofcourse but with Arnav not around I used to be happy to write reports.

We both survived the dip of 2008 and he became a Director legal dept , goldman sachs and I went to be Senior Associate.

Time was flying and I was getting so called older. N my parents wanted to see me settled. I had to move on too. 

Paras met me through an online marriage website, which is like the indian version of speed dating and where most interests you receive are impecably funny requests. Paras was supposed to be the best alliance any girl could die for .and my parents were happy to getting me married to him

As far as I was concerned, I never got what I was looking for a husband in Paras because i had already found it in Arnav. But i thought he was a good guy though I never really liked him.And finally had to draw a line somewhere.

It was the day of my wedding. I was decked up from head to toe and everytime I closed my eyes saw Arnav.

''You look beautiful'' Kavita aunty hugged me and said. Brigadier uncle and Kavita aunty , my best friend's parents had come all the way from Dehradun just to attend my wedding. Aakanksha was there too. Just next to kavita aunty,looking as cute as always dressed in blue anarkali suit. Kavita aunty's face always reminded me of Arnav. He looked exactly like his mom. Aakanksha loved me too. After all she was Arnav's little sister.

Mahek Didi I loved your lehenga. When I get married , you ll have to deck me up.your wedding gift is in the car. I woll get it at time of pheras''

All of a sudden I heard a lot of hustle and bustle downstairs. Paras's father had come . There was too much of chaos.

''10 crores .. The final amount''

What is uncle talking? I asked Prachi bhabhi.. 

Nothing .,you get ready

I am ready bhabhi I need to know..

I climbed the stairs down and heard Mihir bhaiyya and Akshat Jiju discussing.

I think 4 crores is ready and our Kandivali flat is spare for us..so it can be there . So we can settle. You can arrange 3 crores from your side ?

Bhaiyya whats goin on?

He turned and said ''nothing beta. You get ready.. Its your day ''

''Bhaiyya are they asking dowry?''

''No beta .. Its just that we can gift them. We can arrange.''

''Inspite of all this, you think still should get married?'' I asked

''Mahek beta..this is just out of love''

Akshat Jiju.. Do you support dowry?

''Prachi bhabhi, Neha take her upstairs...Beta.. You go upstairs..''

There was a stern tone to jiju's voice. Dad was looking panicked. Bhabhi and Neha didi literally dragged me upstairs.. 

As I was about to enter my room.. I saw him entering.. He was there,yes.. Arnav came there.. Just by looking at him all my tension vanished..somewhere felt that all was going to be okay.. he went to speak to Dad and Akshat jiju's dad.. 

Paras's dad was sitting on the couch.. His fingers were resting on the arm rests of our couch and his body language was so proud and evident as if he is the owner of our house.. Paras was appearing like a timid slave of this dictator.. I never liked him too much but today my instincts were telling me to stop my self from getting into this foolish relationship..

Kavita aunty and Aakanksha went and tried to ease out Mom. I literally had to push didi and bhabhi to get down once again. 

I stood there.. Right next to dad. 

''Papa.. ''I took a deep breath.. 

I held his arm and his hand. The same arm which had given me support n number of times and the same fingers which I held for support when I started walking on my own

''Papa.. I dont want to get married ''

''What..? Beta dont back down.. We havearranged  all the money.. '´

''Its not about the money Dad.. Its about their attitude.. I was a bit louder''

Relax.. We have arranged the money

Dad said

I AM NOT GETTING MARRIED TO THIS IDIOT..'' I shouted in a fit of rage..there was a strong silence..

The entire set of guests , my own parents, family, Paras's family and guests everyone stoodshocked ..i myself couldnt believe I had said this.

Arnav stood there next to me.. Without turning behind I could sense it was him. He was touching my  shoulders.. And no other touch in the world was so warm

He patted my back.. I turned around to see him.. A tiny tear fell off from my eye.. He wiped it with his thumb.

Mahek... He said

He always said Mahek in a distinct tone.. As if it was a therapy..

Listen to me... If you really dont want to get married to Paras , no one will force you. But if you want to get married to Paras and this money is an issue, then we can arrange not just 10 but even 20 crores.. ''

Arnav... I said looking at him.. He looked so good.. I almosy fell like I was in heaven.. And my restlessness soothed when I looked into his eyes.. Dark brown almost black and twinkling like crystals..

'' you know that taking and giving dowry is a crime.. We all are men and women of principles and we all agree that if something isnt right.. It just isnt.. And still mummy, papa, didi, jiju, bhaiyya ,bhabhi and even YOU agree on this ? Why? And how?.. How can you all agree to this?''

He looked at me and put his hands on y shoulders.. ''Because I want you to be happy''

If you want me to be happy Arnav.. MARRY ME!!!!''

I said it.. I said those Golden words.. Which i had kept in my heart for so long.,which was the biggest truth of my life...There was an awkward silence in the crowd.. 

''Mahek.. What are you saying?''he said

Yes Arnav.. I started sobbing..i couldnt control my tears.. I have waited too long for you.. All these years I didnt get married because I thought some day you ll realise your love for me.. But you never will.. Although you love me a lot , a little more than how much I love you.. You ll never ever know.. ''

I couldnt talk more.. I sat on the floor not bothering whether my makeup had smudged..my lehenga would be spoilt..it was my tipping point''

Its been 7 years from that day.. The day I confessed my love .. In front of the whole set of guests.. My parents .. His parents and Paras and his family..Me and Arnav got married in the same mandap on the same day..in the same clothes.. Had a super roller coaster married life.. Blessed with 2 children and awonderful life inspite of the ups and downs .with him life has been rosier through the rosy pair of glasses....Even today I tease him., what if Paras hadnt asked for dowry..would I have married him.. ?

Arnav's answer was.. ''In that case I would have proposed you in front of the whole mandap.. We were destined to be together.''

The real fact was I never gave up on my love.. I just let go of it..And the moment I let go.. My love came back to me.. Its a match of lifetimes.. Truly.. We are meant to be